Life Stylelifestylesex & relationships

The dos and don’ts of one-night stands


If you’re Kenyan, you’ll know the time period the hook up time period “chips funga” nicely. For our different African siblings, let me elaborate on the time period. “Chips funga” loosely means “chips takeaway”, and it refers to an individual you “took away” or “took dwelling”, typically from an occasion or night time membership. When the time period is gender particular to consult with males, the very on-the-nose time period used is “sausage funga”.

For now we are going to use the gender-neutral “chips funga”, by which the particular person taking away is the “chipser” and the particular person being taken away is the “chipsee”. That is typically outlined by whose home you find yourself at.

Listed here are a number of the points you’ll encounter in informal hookups and the way you possibly can navigate round them.

Theirs or yours?

It’s been an ideal night time, you’ve discovered the particular person you need to take dwelling – however whose home do you go to? Assuming each of you may have firm over, this consideration boils right down to consolation and comfort.

If you wish to be in a secure zone, the place you may name in your neighbours if issues flip bitter, your house could be the best choice. It comes with consolation, security and also you gained’t should do the ‘stroll of disgrace’ when it’s over. Nonetheless, you get caught with the difficult and awkward job of navigating the opposite particular person’s peculiar habits and getting them to go away.

We’re going dwelling

Okay, so that you’ve determined whose home will likely be used for the do, however how do you get there and who pays? If one in every of you is driving, this level is moot but when you must take a cab or public transport, then who pays?

The consensus reached by our group was that the particular person whose home is getting used ought to pay for the journey there, as a result of the opposite particular person must pay for his or her journey dwelling. This makes it a good cut up if you’re about equal alternative pairings. If you’re extra old fashioned and count on the person to pay, even in informal encounters, then purpose for your own home so that you gained’t have to fret about getting dwelling. If not, have a plan in place as a result of not each man can pay in your transport dwelling.

Keep in mind, consensual intercourse advantages each individuals and subsequently nobody owes you something for partaking in it. So don’t be the lady pushing for cab cash to get dwelling as a result of he ‘owes’ you for ‘giving up the products’.

PS: You must also use the commute to choose up no matter necessities you want, like condoms, lube, meals, drinks, toiletries and many others. Preparation is essential!

Learn: South African Regulation and A number of Romantic Companions in a Polyamorous Relationship

Not a certain factor?

Generally you’ll have gotten so far as the home solely to understand that you weren’t on the identical web page or somebody modified their thoughts in transit. Given a while to sober up or see the opposite particular person in higher lighting might change a certain factor to probably the most awkward conditions ever.

For this case, options ranged from blatantly asking the particular person to go away to making a faux household that’s on its method dwelling or that it’s a must to go attend to. The one factor that might make it much less awkward is that if each of you may giggle it off and depart it as a missed alternative.

An excellent time for all!

It ought to go with out saying that each events ought to attempt their finest within the bed room and that company ought to have entry to every little thing they might must be comfy. If you’re lacking something fundamental, like toiletries, do your finest to choose them up on the journey dwelling. The extra at dwelling and comfortable your visitor is, the higher the sexual encounter is prone to be. If you’re unwell ready for firm, then don’t push to return to your house.

Keep for breakfast or dwelling time?

Name it savage however most individuals don’t need a hookup to show right into a sleepover, not to mention breakfast. Because the chipsee, attempt to not linger even when the entire affair lasted half an hour. Except it’s expressly understood that it’s a complete night time’s exercise, you need to assume that after it’s achieved, its dwelling time. Deal with it like a job – competently execute your duties, then decide your self up and go dwelling.

Ought to it final all night time, then additionally assume (until supplied) that breakfast is a fantasy. If final night time’s choices are over, they might not have the rest available to supply and, fairly frankly, not everyone seems to be sufficient of a morning particular person to whip one thing up. These are all issues you wouldn’t discover in case you weren’t already dilly-dallying!

Lastly, a big a part of the group felt that attempting to get the opposite particular person’s quantity once they don’t appear eager or haven’t overtly indicated that they want a repeat state of affairs is simply awkward for everybody.

Have you ever acquired something so as to add to the record?

That is Africa

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